Ascencion of the Devil
by Devon Goes to Heaven
Summary: Heliopolis falls and Muruta Azrael finds himself on the Archangel. The events that transpire make him question all that he believes.


**_Disclaimer:_** _I do not own Gundam Seed or any of its characters. I am not profiting from this in any way._

 ** _AN:_** _I had just did a full binge rewatch of Gundam SEED and watched America History X right after. So, I suppose this is the product of watching both of them so close together. This fandom is relatively inactive. I'm not even sure how many will read this, but I had to get this out of my system._

 ** _Ascension of the Devil_**

" _But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?" -Mark Twain_

 _ **I. Flay Allster**_

The amount of death and destruction that had occurred on Heliopolis reaffirmed his beliefs. Coordinators aren't _human_. No, they are mere savages hell bent on eradicating the Naturals. If he hadn't delayed his trip last month, he wouldn't be stuck aboard this damned ship. Muruta Azrael longs for Earth. He misses gravity. He misses the smell of the ocean near his house. He misses _everything_.

The worst part is that the ship's captain is foolish enough to let one of those _things_ pilot the Strike. _The Strike that he had commissioned with his money._ Murrue Ramius also has the stupidity to confine Lacus Clyne to a room rather than throw her in the brig. Azrael glares as he sees the pink haired Coordinator waltz into the mess hall without supervision. She's managed to escape her quarters... _again_. When he returns to Earth, he'll be sure to have _this_ Ramius woman stripped of her rank and discharged from the Earth Alliance.

" _This is nuts!_ Why is someone from ZAFT allowed to walk alone without permission?"

Azrael's eyes move to Flay Allster. _Ah_ \- George Allster's emotional wreck of a daughter. Since her arrival on the Archangel, she has been nothing but a nuisance. Not that he disagrees with her, but how stupid could one be to create such a scene? Azrael hates emotional women, and this girl is the most unreasonable girl he's ever met in his life.

He hates Lacus Clyne for what she is, but he'd rather keep his affiliations to himself. Once he meets with the Atlantic Forces, he'll have Lacus detained. She's _the_ perfect political hostage. He grins to himself as he rises from his seat. He disposes of his tray at the counter and leaves the room. Let the stupid girl throw her tantrum. He'll deal with Lacus Clyne appropriately when the time comes.

 _ **II. Lacus Clyne**_

Azrael is on the bridge when ZAFT attacks the Atlantic Forces. The ship shakes as missiles connect with the ship. His eyes meet with Natarle Badgiruel's violet eyes for only a moment. She's so _fearless_ \- or if she does carry fear, she never shows it. She should command this ship. She's the most rational person on board the Archangel.

 _And she's beautiful…_

Azrael keeps his eyes forward. Ramius is barking orders to her crew. He _hates_ Murrue Ramius. She thinks with her heart and not her mind. She'll get them killed if she continues making foolish decisions.

Azrael clenches the steel armrest on his chair. He cannot deny that he's nervous. Even a fool can see that they're losing this battle. He's going to die here, because of Ramius' poor leadership.

The doors to the bridge _swish_ open. He sees Flay Allster with Lacus and a knife in her freehand. " _I'll kill this girl!"_

 _Oh, for fucks sake!_ Ramius is foolish enough to leave the bridge accessible to this dumb girl. He places both of his fingers on his temples and draws in a frustrated breath.

"If they fire upon my papa's ship, I'll kill this girl!" she threatens. "Tell them that!"

The Vesalius fires a clean shot upon George Allster's ship. Azrael's eyes dilate as the ship erupts. Flay is screeching like a damn banshee. Azrael ignores the girls pathetic screams and grabs Lacus by her bicep. If they are going to survive, they must use Siegel Clyne's precious daughter as a hostage. Natarle's eyes meet with his. She leaps from her post and grabs Kuzzey's earpiece in one quick swipe.

"Attention ZAFT Forces. This is the Archangel of the Earth Alliance Forces!" Natarle's voice is hardened but calm. "Currently in the care of our ship is PLANT Supreme Chairmen Siegel Clyne's daughter, Lacus Clyne. We came across a lifepod with her on board and took her in for humanitarian reasons. However, should you decide to attack this ship, we will consider this as abandonment of your responsibilities to protect Lacus Clyne. We will then take care of this situation as we see fit!"

Azrael releases his hold on Lacus Clyne. His eyes fall on Natarle once more. She's eying Murrue Ramius. The tension between the two is thick as they stare each other down.

"We cannot afford to have the Strike and the Archangel destroyed here," Natarle says.

Ramius' eyes break Natarle's gaze as they shift downward. "I know, Natarle."

Natarle looks to Azrael. "Take Lacus to her room, Mr. Azrael."

His breath catches in his throat. He swallows roughly at the command. If any other person aboard this ship had given him that command, he might have refused. He does not like the idea of being near the Coordinator Girl, but he also does not wish to refuse Natarle.

"As you wish, Lieutenant," Azrael grins to Natarle.

Natarle's lips part briefly. Their eyes meet once more for just a moment too long. Her eyes shift away from him as she returns to her post. Azrael takes Lacus by her arm and leaves the bridge.

It will be quick. He will drop her off at her room and he will do his best to avoid her. Azrael reaches Lacus' room. He keys in the access code and the doors open. He pushes her inside the room. He could leave, but perhaps he should lay down some common sense to this girl before she causes more trouble.

Azrael crosses his arms and stares down the Coordinator. "You have caused enough trouble for everyone onboard. I would suggest that you stay here until you are asked to leave this room."

Azrael expects her to cry and plead to him. She doesn't. Lacus looks up to him. Her eyes do not falter as his eyes meet hers. "I know who you are, Muruta Azrael."

Her words feel like a knife to his gut. He drops his arms to his sides as he clenches his fists. He wants to deck this girl right in the face. He resists with all the mental strength he can muster.

"My father has spoken of you," Lacus continues. "You are part of Blue Cosmos."

He steps towards the girl, fists still clenched. "I would choose your words _very_ carefully if I were you."

"I'm not afraid of you," she says. "I pity you. How could one man be so hateful?"

Memories flash from his childhood. He wants to strike this woman. He wants to wrap his arms around her throat and strangle her to death. He takes another step towards her as his eyes narrow at her with sheer disgust.

"You know nothing of what your people can do!" he hisses. "I will not idly standby as your _people_ wipe out my kind."

"Is that what you believe will happen?" Lacus says. "Does fear drive you, Muruta Azrael?"

The word _fear_ sticks to him like glue. He remembers the beatings after school. He remembers the _jealousy_. He remembers the weakness. Then, there's the memory of his mother slapping him after asking why she hadn't made him a Coordinator. _No, no, no..._ he can't think of it. He won't let this girl get into his head.

"What of the Lieutenant you seem so fond of?" she asks. "Does she know your loyalties? I wonder how she would feel if she knew your affiliations."

Azrael's fists unclench. His eyes are dilated as he looks down upon Lacus. She places one hand on the side of her arm and smiles up at him. It feels as if her hand is burning through his blazer and it's taking him everything not to backhand her.

"I don't want to be your enemy, Muruta," she says. "To continue this cycle of hate will only lead to more bloodshed."

Azrael pulls away from her. He takes two steps backwards and looks to her. _This girl surely must be mad_. She should hate him as much as he hates her. She's _different_. She's not like the bullies from school. She's not like them at all. Azrael clutches his head with one hand. He runs towards the door and leaves without looking back. _No_ , Lacus Clyne is young. She _will_ be like them one day. Coordinators are _evil_. He can't doubt himself. _Not now_. _Not ever_.

 _ **III. The 8th Fleet**_

Reaching Earth was a relief. The teenagers from Heliopolis would no longer be manning stations on the bridge. The Coordinator would no longer be piloting the Strike. Although he is disappointed that the boy had returned their hostage to ZAFT, it no longer matters to him. The Archangel will drop to Alaska, and Azrael will book a flight home as soon as he leaves the ship.

Azrael breathes as he sits on the bridge. He neglected to leave the ship in the event that ZAFT attacked. With ZAFT constantly tailing the Archangel, Azrael isn't confident that they are safe regardless of their meeting with The 8th Fleet. He drums his fingers against his armrest. He's impatient and nervous. There's a part of him that almost expects Rau Le Creuset to attack.

 _Rau Le Creuset_ \- the unlikely ally on the other side. _Or so he thought_. They had laid the barebones of an insidious attack on ZAFT, but now, Azrael is unsure if he can really go through with them. He _can't_. Not after being hunted down by Le Crueset's team since Heliopolis. To lose Le Crueset as an ally means that he'll have to go back to the drawing board once he meets with Djibril. But, he can no longer continue his private negotiations with Le Creuset. Not after the man had almost cost him his life several times.

Alarms blare. " _All hands level one battle stations._ "

His heart pounds. Both hands grip the ends of his armrests. It had only meant to be a thought, but he says it regardless. "You've got to be fucking kidding me!"

 _ **IV. Kira Yamato**_

The drop to Alaska had been a disaster. Ramius had foolishly decided to chase after the Strike as opposed to dropping successfully to their destination in Alaska. Now they are up against the Desert Tiger, and they are fighting a losing battle each day. Their supplies are dwindling, and Azrael is no longer confident that he will make it to Alaska.

The wind whips through his hair as he rides in the back of a jeep. Natarle is sitting next to her in a purple button down shirt. He cannot deny that he's a bit flustered by her now that he's seen her in plain clothes. Azrael forces his eyes forward. She's undeniably beautiful, but so unapproachable. He might as well consider himself lucky that they're now on a first name basis.

"Thank you for doing this, Muruta," Natarle says. "The rest of our crew hardly have the money to afford much. It's nice that you're willing to part with your money to supply us with what we need."

"It's the least I can do," Azrael says. "The Archangel crew has kept me alive this long."

The jeep slows to a stop. Natarle retrieves two pieces of paper from her pocket. She hands both of them to Azrael. He unfolds the first one. It's a list of food and supplies that Murrue Ramius has listed. Azrael unfolds the second list. _Shampoo, Makeup (Preferably MAC), Dior Skin Cream._ It looks more like a string of purchases that his ex-girlfriend would run up on his credit card rather than a supply list.

"What is this?" Azrael asks with irritation.

Natarle takes the paper from his hands and skims through it. She crumbles the paper. "My apologies. Flay had given me this earlier. I had assumed that it was important."

"Nothing that girl ever does is important," Azrael says. "I'm not sure why the alliance allowed her to enlist."

"Be kind, Muruta. She's just lost her father," Natarle pauses. Her eyes lower before she says, "I hate to ask you one last favor…"

"Ask and you shall receive," Azrael jokes.

Natarle laughs. _God_ , she's more beautiful when she's not so serious. Her laughter dies and she looks up to him. "I need you to chaperone Kira and Cagalli for me."

 _Kira_. Azrael regrets his sudden agreement to this favor. Damn his attraction to this woman. He keeps his eyes forward. It's only a few hours, and it isn't as if Kira really _knows_ that he's affiliated with Blue Cosmos. Azrael forces a smile as he turns back to Natarle.

"It isn't a problem."

"Thank you," she says. "We'll meet here in three hours."

Azrael steps out of the jeep. He looks to both Kira and Cagalli. Cagalli is carrying an empty duffle bag over her shoulder. She waves toward him. Azrael can't deny that he respects Cagalli for all that she's done to protect the Archangel, but he stills harbors uneasy feelings toward Kira. It almost feels unfair. He so easily commends Cagalli for her accomplishments, but denies Kira the same respect.

 _No_ , Kira doesn't deserve respect. He is a Coordinator. Azrael must remember that. He must remember what Kira is...

"Uh...Mr. Azrael," Kira stammers as he rubs the back of his hair. "Lt. Badgiruel had said that we would be accompanied by you today."

Cagalli is grinning up at him as she slaps him on the back of his shoulder. "There's this place nearby that serves some bomb ass food, Mr. Azrael."

His entire body tenses at the sight of Kira Yamato. He takes in a deep breath and forces a smile. "Lead the way."

Azrael follows Kira and Cagalli in silence. The two chat as if they are brother and sister despite being Natural and Coordinator. Cagalli doesn't fear him despite her Natural upbringing. Then again, does Cagalli really fear anything?

Cagalli turns into a restaurant. She pivots and smiles to him. "Mr. Azrael find us somewhere to sit. Kira and I will get you some food."

"I can pay for my own," he tries to refuse.

"No," she says. "You don't get to refuse my offer. You're already paying for everything else."

"We'll be back in a second, sir," Kira smiles to him.

The teenagers leave him to find a table. Azrael supposes he'll let her do him one kindness. It's not as if it can hurt. He takes a seat at a vacant table and leans back in his chair. He releases an exhausted sigh. All this damn trouble, because he can't refuse one woman...

" _I don't want to be your enemy, Muruta…_ "

Lacus Clyne's words are ringing in his head. Azrael looks over to Kira and Cagalli. Kira is holding two plates of food. He sets one plate in front of Azrael and the other in a vacant seat. Kira sits next to Azrael. Azrael tenses. He sees Cagalli eying him. He tries to smile, but he _just_ can't.

Cagalli places her hand on his shoulder. "There's no need to be worried. Kira's a Coordinator. If anyone tries to attack us, he'll protect you. Right, Kira?"

"Lt. Badgiruel will have my head if anything happens to you," Kira laughs. "She said so herself."

"Natarle said that?" Azrael ask.

"Yeah," Kira says. "The look she gave me will give me nightmares for a week."

" _Wait a minute,_ " Cagalli says. "You _like_ Miss Badgiruel, don't you?"

"Don't be so childish," Azrael says.

Kira and Cagalli both burst out into laughter. He crosses his arms and gives each of them a hardened glare. The two of them laugh even harder.

"We won't say anything, Mr. Azrael," Kira promises.

Cagalli giggles before saying, "Your secret is safe with us."

His nerves seem to relax at Kira's words. He looks to the boy and their eyes meet. He's seen him with George Allster's daughter. He remembers her rants and the things she had said to Kira. He shouldn't care, but…

"Why are you with that girl, Kira?" Azrael asks.

Kira looks to him. He pauses before asking, "Flay?"

" _Yes, Flay_ ," Azrael replies. "She's only going to cause you problems. I knew her father. He is part of... _Blue Cosmos._ You're a Coordinator. How do you expect it to end with her?"

Cagalli looks to him and then to Kira. Kira goes silent for a moment.

"She comforted me," Kira's voice is quiet. "She was there for me when no one else was."

"She was there for you, because it benefited her," Azrael replies. "The apple doesn't fall from the tree, Kira. Her father was what he was. I don't expect she'll be much different."

Kira looks to him before his gaze casts downward. "I owe her. I couldn't protect her father."

"You don't owe her or her father," Azrael says. "Her father would have killed you without a second thought if he could."

" _I don't want to be your enemy, Muruta…_ "

Lacus Clyne is in his head again. He searches for the hate he's held for so long. He shouldn't care for Kira. He tries to find solace in his own hatred, but he _can't_. He regrets delaying his trip to Heliopolis. _This shouldn't happen_. He shouldn't feel compassion for Kira. He should wish for the boy's death. _Why is this happening?_

Shots fire. Kira dives towards him. Several shots hit the table they once sat at. Azrael looks up to Kira with wide eyes. His heart is racing as he processes what exactly had just happened.

" _Blue Cosmos_!" Cagalli shouts.

Azrael grabs his pistol and takes it in hand. There's a man with a blue hat upon his head with " _For A Pure and Blue World"_ written in white letters. His face is so _familiar._ His gun is pointed towards him. His attacker knows exactly who he is.

" _Race traitor!"_ the man screams to him as he aims his gun. "Lord Djibril sends his regards!"

Azrael pulls the trigger of the pistol, managing to make a clean shot at the man's head. Weapons continue to fire. The men pledged to Blue Cosmos are falling one by one. A man in a ridiculous yellow and red shirt is firing shots at their enemies. Sunglasses shield the man's eyes as he continues to fire shots upon the Blue Cosmos terrorists. The shooting stops. Kira and Cagalli are holding each other. The man steps forward with gun facing towards them. Azrael's not sure if it is the conversation from before or the fact that Kira saved his life, but he finds himself standing between this man and Kira.

The man burst out into laughter. "There's a sight I never thought I'd see from you, Muruta Azrael. Has the sight of war changed you?"

The man takes his sunglasses from his eyes. _Andrew Waltfeld._ His fists clench as Waltfeld steps towards them with his gun still drawn. He looks around him to see ZAFT soldiers surrounding him. He bites his lip as his nails dig into his palms.

"My intention was to kill you, Azrael," Waltfeld says. "But, seeing this... _scene_ has swayed my decision. I'll allow you to die in combat tomorrow."

"That is _if_ we die," Azrael says through clenched teeth.

Waltfeld laughs again. His eyes shift to Kira. He looks back to Azrael. "You both looked so chummy earlier. It'd be a shame if he found out what kind of person you actually are."

Waltfeld turns his back, leaving the three of them in the now destroyed restaurant. Cagalli and Kira are both looking to him.

"He's messing with you, Kira," he says. "He wants you to doubt so that you'll defect."

 _It's a lie_. He's told so many in his life, _but this one_...this one is the first one he regrets.

 _ **V. The Red Sea**_

Azrael had never expected Kira to best Andrew Waldfeld. The boy came through just as he always has and now they are at sea. Azrael leans against the railing as he stares out into the blue water. He's missed the smell of the ocean from his vacation home in Florida. To smell the sea almost makes him feel as if he's there.

Natarle approaches him and leans on the railing. "Kira seems to have taken a liking to you."

His gut twists at her words. He had tried to rationalize it at first. He would tell himself that Kira was the _one good Coordinator_. He would tell himself that Kira _was not like the rest_. Now, he's so conflicted. Blue Cosmos had fired upon him in the name of Djibril. It's not as if he can waltz back into their headquarters and ask for his leadership position back. He even wonders if Djibril had been communicating with Le Creuset while the Vesalius chased the Archangel across space.

"He saved my life," is all he can say.

All his life he has been consumed in an inferno of hatred. It feels odd to find this moment of peace. He doesn't miss the rage that once drove him. It made him drink to excess. It kept him up until morning, and his rage would even haunt him in his sleep. He looks to Natarle. She has no idea. One day she will know. The truth has a terrible way of climbing to the surface. _What will she think of him?_

"Before all this…" he begins. "I was a horrible person."

"Don't be so hard on yourself, Muruta," Natarle says. "We were all different people before this war started. None of us appreciated what we had."

He wishes that it were that simple. Azrael casts his eyes down at the water. He doesn't deserve someone like her.

 _ **VI. Orb**_

The Archangel had crossed into Orb territory with a stroke of good luck. The mystery of Cagalli origins had been one no one expected. The girl was more than just a soldier, but the daughter of Uzumi Nara Athha. They are alive only because one really important girl happened to be on their ship.

He wishes that he could be with Kira and Cagalli on the streets or that he could meet Uzumi himself. Most of all, he wishes he could be near Natarle. _He can't._ He must stay on the Archangel, because Uzumi must be aware of his origins. He had taken after Flay's brief seasickness and convinced the crew that he was sick as well.

Azrael stares up at the ceiling of his bunk. When he gets to Alaska, he's going to leave all of this behind. He can donate his money to better causes than inciting a race war. He can _change_. _He has changed_. Once this war is over, he will find a way to use his money for peace rather than war.

 _ **VII. Dearka Elsman**_

It really shouldn't have hit him this hard. Death is a natural part of war. Kira Yamato wasn't supposed to have this much of an impact on him. He walks through the halls of the Archangel aimlessly. Cagalli will be a wreck when she finds out. _Hell_ , the whole crew is having such a hard time processing the boy's death. It's as if his ghost still lives in the Archangel. Miriallia is having a hard time processing Tolle's death. The entire crew has been possessed by grief. It's almost as if the Archangel has fallen into hell itself.

Azrael hears screaming. He glances forward to see the medical bay door open. He can hear Miriallia, Sai, and Flay shouting. He rushes to the medical bay. Flay is holding a pistol towards Dearka Elsman. He dives toward Flay. The shot fires just as he leaps on top of her. Glass shatters from what were once lights above them.

Flay crawls out from underneath him. She looks to him with hate in her eyes. He's seen that look before. He used to see it in the mirror every day of his life. _That look_ \- it used to haunt him.

" _Why_...why did you stop me!" she screams.

His body becomes stiff as Dearka looks to him. The ZAFT pilot looks as if he regrets surrendering to the Archangel. Azrael looks to Miriallia who is crying hysterically into Sai's chest. Azrael climbs to his feet and dusts off his suit.

" _Muruta…?_ "

Azrael turns to see Natarle standing behind him. Her violet eyes are wide as she looks into the medical bay.

"Flay," he says. "She tried to shoot the ZAFT prisoner."

Natarle looks passed him at Flay. Her gaze falls back onto Azrael. His fists clench as he fights back all of the negative emotions that have filled him for days. He cannot show her that he's grieving for Kira and Tolle. _He cannot look weak_.

"As a Military Contractor, I will be questioned when we reach Alaska. I have no choice to but to report this incident," he says. "Her mental state is beyond reason, Natarle. She's become a liability now. I'll ask the appropriate personnel to discharge her when we land."

He walks passed Natarle. His anger used to empower him, but this guilt... _this grief_...feels as if it is eating him from the inside.

 _ **VIII. Alaska**_

Natarle's hand is tightly clasped to a resistant Flay. She's protesting to stay. She's calling Natarle names that she doesn't deserve to be called. It's sad watching her. At her age, he was exactly the same person. Natarle turns to face Flay. She grips Flay's arm before the girl can run.

"You will be returned to your home in Orb," she says. "The Earth Alliance will provide you with paid services to a psychiatrist upon your return."

"I don't need a psychiatrist!" she shouts as she struggles in Natarle's grasp. "Miriallia, Sai, and Azrael lied to you! I never tried to shoot anyone! I need to stop them! I need to stop the Coordinators!"

Murrue looks to Flay with all the compassion in the world. She looks to Natarle. The women both salute each other. They drop their salute. Azrael offers his hand to Murrue. She takes it and they shake.

"Thank you, Natarle. Thank you, Mr. Azrael. I'm not sure if we would have made it here without both of your help," her eyes look to Flay. "The Earth Alliance thanks you for your service Flay. Please do get home safe."

Mu grabs his suitcase in hand. His eyes show just as much compassion for Flay as Murrue's had. The girl has now dissolved into a fit of sobs as she mutters to herself. He can't hate her. She's as lost as he once was. _She'll get better_. She'll be able to get the help she needs once she returns to Orb.

Flay is difficult as they take her through a series of halls. She shifts between bursting into tears and screaming at the top of her lungs. His heart twists at the sight of the girl's agony. So long he had found her irritating, but now he's starting to believe he projected his own self-loathing onto her.

Two women officers are waiting in front of the discharge office. Flay likely won't return home as Natarle had promised. She'll receive a psychiatric evaluation and be placed under the state's care. It will be a long time before she will be able to have a normal life. Natarle is introducing Flay to the officers in charge of her discharge process. Flay seems to have calmed and reached a state of acceptance. She's wiping stray tears from her eyes as she nods to both women. She parts from Natarle and follows both women into a room.

Natarle returns to both Mu and Azrael. There's this universal tension between the three of them. Azrael's eyes meet with Natarle's violet eyes. _This is it_. He'll leave Alaska, and he'll never see her again. _It's for the best_. He can rebuild his life, and she can find someone who is more deserving of her in the process.

"Where will you go now?" she asks.

"Florida," he says. "I'm going to take an extended stay in my vacation home."

Natarle lets out a small laugh. "I wish I could join you. Maybe once all of this is over…"

He _really_ shouldn't do this. Azrael reaches into the top pocket of his blazer to retrieve a business card. He hands it to Natarle. " _Well_...when you return stateside, give me a call."

Natarle takes the blue card from his hand. She looks to it, and then, looks back to him. "I look forward to it."

Mu burst into a fit of laughter. Azrael and Natarle look to him. His grin falls from his face as he throws both of his hands up defensively. "It's... _well_...we were all wondering if you two were a thing. I guess Newman and Chandra lost this bet we had…"

Natarle glares at Mu. "Commander, I advise you to be more professional in the future."

Mu let's out a deep sigh. "You know, I'm going to miss the crew. It's like we all became family. I'm worried..."

"Murrue Ramius got us to Alaska," Natarle says. "I'm sure she'll keep her crew alive till the war ends."

"You're right," Mu says with another heavy sigh.

Natarle salutes Mu. "It was a pleasure serving with you, Commander Flaga."

"The pleasure was mine, Lt. Badgiruel," Mu says as he return his salute. His hand drops to his side as he pivots towards Azrael. Mu extends his hand to him. "Fly safe, Mr. Azrael."

Azrael takes his hand and gives it a shake. "You too, Commander Flaga."

Mu parts takes his suitcase in hand and parts from the group. The tension becomes thicker as he stands with Natarle. This shouldn't be as hard as it is, but there's part of him that fears that she won't make it back. He fears that this is the last time he might see her. Azrael wishes he could kiss her goodbye, but not here in front of all of her peers. It would be career suicide for her.

"I guess this is goodbye, then," Natarle looks up to him.

"Until you return…"

She smiles meekly. "Goodbye, Muruta."

"Goodbye Natarle…"

Natarle takes her suitcase in hand. She pivots away from him. He's watching her walk away from him, and he has this fear that she'll never return. She's almost too the door now - _almost gone_.

The entire room shakes. Azrael manages to maintain his footing. His stomach slips. _Of course_ ZAFT would attack Alaska right when the Archangel docked. He's about to run for shelter, but _he remembers_. Djibril has managed to set in motion plans that were once merely an afterthought on paper. Every single person in this vacinity is going to die if they don't haul ass out of this damn base.

It's been so long that he's forgotten about who he once was. Azrael rushes towards Natarle. She's running towards him. The two of them embrace tightly.

"Come with me!" he says.

"I can't abandon my orders!" she shouts.

"Forget your orders, Natarle! If we don't go back to the Archangel, we are going to die!"

 _ **IX. Freedom**_

It was a mere idea on paper. The details hadn't been drawn out yet, but the idea had been created. Rau Le Creuset had explained that he had information that ZAFT would attack an unnamed base. If Spitbreak was confirmed, they would set a trap in the base Rau Le Creuset specified. _People were going to die_. Back then, he was able to separate himself from the lives lost from this plan. It was easy to justify himself when hiding behind his own fanaticism.

Natarle has returned to her post on the bridge. Azrael eyes meet hers briefly before his eyes look forward. There is a ZAFT Mobile Suit pointing a massive riffle towards them. His breath catches in his throat. His hands tighten around his armrest as he prepares himself. _This is it_. This is how he dies.

A beam slices through the ZAFT Mobile Suit, cutting it directly in half. The suit falls from view and he can practically hear everyone breath again. The back of an unknown mobile suit floats in front of the bridge. It's blue wings spread out to shield the bridge.

" _This is Kira Yamato! I'm here to help! Please get your ship out of here!"_

Kira Yamato _...is alive._

 _ **X. Blue Cosmos**_

Operation Spitbreak had been successful, but the Archangel had escaped with the help of Kira Yamato and Athrun Zala. _Athrun_ \- the son that defied his father. It would seem that this war has everyone questioning their loyalties. The Archangel's return to Orb was smoother than expected, but Azrael predicts that it is only the calm before Djibril's storm.

The Archangel successfully docks inside Orb. _It is time_. It is time to come forward with everything. He will come forward to Uzumi Nara Athha with all of his sins. He won't feign sea sickness this time. He'll walk with Murrue, Mu, and Natarle to Uzumi Nara Athha. He'll stand before the leader of Orb, and he will confess all that he knows of Blue Cosmos. He'll take whatever punishment Uzumi deems fit. He'll give up any chance he ever had to be with Natarle. He'll give up his life if he has to.

"You're not sick this time?" Natarle asks.

"It must be the adrenaline," he says with a weak smile. "I'm just glad to be alive."

Azrael rises from his seat on the bridge. He follows Murrue and Natarle out of the bridge. Natarle slows her pace to walk side-by-side with Azrael. It's different now. Before Alaska, he had no idea that she saw him the same way he saw her. Now that he knows, it makes telling Uzumi the truth so much harder.

 _But, he must do it_.

"You seem startled," Natarle comments.

"I wish I could say I'm surprised with what happened in Alaska," he pauses. "But, I'm not."

"It'll settled in a couple of days," Natarle says. "It's hard for me too. I've been nothing but loyal to the Earth Alliance. It's like a knife has been driven in my back."

Natarle's last words feel like a stab to the heart. He wishes she didn't have to find out so soon after the assault on Alaska, but it must be done. If he's ever to wash away the sin he's committed, he must do this.

Azrael follows Murrue down the exit ramp. Uzumi is waiting below. Their eyes meet and Uzumi scowls at him. He does not address Azrael immediately, and instead shifts to Murrue. "I wish to speak with the three of you at once."

"Of course, sir," Murrue answers.

The three of them walk in silence until they reach a meeting room. A guard opens the door for the three of them. There are three chairs sitting before a vacant desk. Uzumi sits behind the desk while Murrue, Natarle, and Azrael take their seats before him.

"The Earth Alliance betrayed us," Murrue speaks. "We could not think of anywhere else to seek refuge."

"You have refuge in Orb, Ms. Ramius," Uzumi offers. "We will find a way to deal with the alliance and ZAFT when the time comes."

The room becomes quiet as Uzumi's eyes fall onto Azrael. He hasn't expressed outrage towards him yet. Perhaps he's giving him the chance to come forward. Azrael breathes as his entire body becomes numb.

"Rau Le Creuset of ZAFT is behind Operation Spitbreak…" his voice is shaking as he speaks. "It won't be long before Le Creuset and Djibril come for Orb. We are on borrowed time Mr. Athha."

Murrue and Natarle gasp as they look to him. Uzumi doesn't look impressed by his confession. He laces his fingers in front of him as he stares down Azrael.

"Muruta Azrael of Blue Cosmos," he says. "Are you telling me this out of honesty or for your own self-preservation?"

His entire body is completely numb. He cannot look to Natarle. He imagines eyes that once looked to him with respect now glare at him with sheer loathing.

"I...had…the unfortunate circumstances of being caught between a military crossfire during a visit to Heliopolis. When I first joined the Archangel...I expected to reach Alaska much sooner," he says. "Kira Yamato...saved my life in Africa ironically from the Blue Cosmos terrorists in the area. It made me question all that I was... _all that I believed._ Mr. Athha...Orb is about to be a warzone. I was never able to learn Rau Le Creuset's true intentions, but he is a danger to all of humanity. I'm not sure who's side he's truly on, but Djibril and Le Creuset will be at Orb's doorstep any day now. Djibril needs your Mass Driver and he will burn Orb to the ground to get to it."

Uzumi looks to him. He closes his eyes and draws in a deep breath. His hands drop to his sides. When his eyes reopen, he looks back towards Azrael.

"If you - of all people - can be swayed to the idea peace, I suppose there is really hope that the rest of the world can too," Uzumi says. "I won't detain to you, but I will ask you to inform me of everything you know of these Rau Le Creuset and Djibril characters."

The tension softens as he looks to Uzumi. "I will tell you everything I know, Mr. Athha."

 _ **XI. Natarle Badgiruel**_

When Natarle had left Uzumi's briefing room, she wouldn't even look at him. Azrael lays straight in his bed, staring at the ceiling of his bunk. His entire body is still numb from his confession. He tries to think of his vacation home of Florida, but by now, his accounts and assets must have been seized by the Earth Alliance. He will have nothing to go home to once this is all over.

There's a knock at the door. Azrael climbs out of his bed and moves towards his door. He opens the door to see Natarle Badgiruel standing on the other side. Her eyes are red as tears brim the lids. She steps inside the room and the door automatically closes behind her.

"All this time…" her voice shakes. "Did you know...when we were in Alaska?"

"No," he says. "I knew the groundwork of the plan, but the details were never presented to me. Lord Djibril must have taken over while I was aboard the Archangel."

Natarle's eyes are lowered to the floor. He's never seen her like this. She's always been so well composed and strong as steel. To see her so vulnerable breaks his heart. He wants to reach out to her. He wants to hold her. _But, he won't_. He doesn't deserve to hold her.

"You fucking asshole!" she shouts.

She throws herself against him and buries her face into his chest. She's dissolved into tears that he never knew she could cry. Her hands are digging into his purple button down shirt. She pounds her hands against his chest. Azrael wraps his arms around her and pulls her closer to him. Tears are rolling down his cheeks as he clings to her like she's his last lifeline.

"I'm sorry, Natarle," he whispers. " _I'm so sorry_."

 _ **XII. Lord Djibril**_

Djibril's assault upon Orb wasn't an immediate success like his destruction of ZAFT's forces in Alaska. It had taken him three attempts to finally take the control of the city. Uzumi Nara Athha had ordered that the Archangel retreat into space once Djibril's force had their firm grip on Orb.

Azrael is stunned that Murrue hadn't discharged him from the Archangel - although he'd gotten quite the tongue lashing from both her and Mu before boarding. He sits on his seat in the front of the bridge. There's the main screen that stares out into the sky. Then, there's a small screen that shows Cagalli's ship launching from the Mass Driver that will soon belong to Lord Djibril.

Once Cagalli's ship has cleared the Mass Driver, Azrael watches it bursts into flames. His lips part as he gasps. If the Mass Driver has been destroyed, he imagines that Uzumi has set fire to Morgenroete as well. Lord Djibril has just torn Orb apart for nothing. Thousands of innocent civilians had died for a goal Djibril would never accomplish.

 _It could have been him_. In another life, it would have been him launching that assault upon Orb. He might not have ever even knew Natarle Badgiruel _or worse_ he might have even killed her.

 _ **XIII. The Dominion**_

It's a ship Lord Djibril must have commissioned with his money just as Azrael had commissioned the Archangel. He imagines in the bridge that Djibril sits exactly where he sits. The man had hailed the Archangel, asking that the Clyne Faction surrender. His shit eating grin had been painted with purple lipstick as he stroked the fur of his insufferable black cat. Azrael had even saw Flay Allster sitting in a white Earth Alliance uniform on the screen

" _Muruta Azrael...I ask that you come to your senses. Tell the crew to surrender the Archangel and you will be pardoned for your betrayal."_

" _Go fuck yourself, Djibril."_

" _Very well, race traitor. You will die with the Archangel Crew. For a Blue and Pure World!"_

The Dominion had been in combat for what felt like hours. The Archangel has taken heavy damage. It's likely that they will all perish in their assault. The Dominion's canons are glowing before the Archangel. His eyes look to Natarle for what might be his last second. But, death does not come.

Azrael's eyes stare forward. The Strike is blocking the blast from hitting the bridge. He watches as the Strike falls to pieces before his eyes. Murrue is screaming for Mu as the Strike becomes a splitting mess of metal.

"Captain, the target is still in sight," Sai says.

"Fire the Lohengrin…" Murrue her teeth.

The entire bridge falls quiet as beams of light rush toward the Dominion. The beams connect with the bridge where Lord Djibril and Flay Allster still sit. _Flay Allster_ \- the emotionally distraught war orphan who died with her prejudices still intact. It could have been him dying in that ship.

He watches the Dominion go up in smoke before his eyes. _It's over_. The war is truly over. Azrael relaxes back in his chair as tears roll down his cheeks. Natarle is floating towards him. She embraces him. Azrael pulls her close to him as he cries into her shoulder.

When this war begin, Azrael had set out to win this war. He had every intention of doing whatever it took to achieve his goals. His goals may have changed now, but so much is the same.

 _He fought the war, and he won._

 ** _Fin_**

* * *

 ** _AN:_** _I had meant for this to be so much shorter, but wow...7,000+ words. I'm not sure what most people will make of this since Azrael was pretty terrible in the original canon. My favorite sections were Kira Yamato, Alaska, and Natarle Badgiruel. But, I'm pretty content with how the full thing came out. Please drop a comment and tell me what you think._


End file.
